So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.
1 Corinthians 10:31
Ever question God about your life wondering if what you do matters? From the greatest achievement to the most mundane action? For me it boils down to purpose. If I’m asking what’s the point, then I want to know the reason behind what I’m doing.
Just a couple months ago, the truth hit me smack-dab in my core. Sure, I had heard these words before, but suddenly God’s spirit spoke so strongly to mine that I knew and understood. It was when I was seeking Him, when I became desperate for an answer, when I became desperate for Him, that it was right there…
These last three months have been some of the most trying for me. I moved back to New Orleans to settle affairs with my great aunt’s estate (whom passed away last November). I had lived with her for a couple of years prior to moving to Texas, talked to her almost daily and stayed with her on every visit home. Some of my most cherished moments were shared with her. I made her a promise, and I stuck to it. It wasn’t as easy as I may have made it seem to those around me. I battled with the decision to move for weeks. I left a good career, a nice (and beautiful community), a great church community, my dad and sister, and some very good friends. (Sounds crazy, right?) Coming home didn’t feel like home. Going through my aunt’s belongings, making decisions on things, wasn’t easy. My whole focus was getting things done to make life happen again. For a while there I felt trapped, out of control, lost, confused. I had put my life on hold. I felt alone. Life seemed surreal. Yet through it all, God remained faithful and constantly reminded me that He was here with me, and that despite my discomfort things were going to be okay.
Still, I questioned my decision. A decision I had felt a peace in when the result wasn’t what I expected. I questioned God on what I had done, what I was doing. Because in the midst of all of this, I was still putting up blog posts; I was still dreaming dreams; I was still planning for the future; I was still drawing up new designs for an online shop; and I was still thinking of ways to turn Elizabeth Ashleigh into the brand (and business) I want it to be. But then I thought, What’s the point? Does what I do even matter? Other great creatives are already doing these things. They’re able to get their work out there, to build a life that matters to them while I’m stuck here in this mess. I can’t do this. I don’t feel inspired the way I used to. Maybe this is a lost cause. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I was foolish to think, to believe… Why bother still doing the things that set my heart on fire? Why do what I do? My thoughts were toxic and selfish. I just cried out to God in desperation. And then, the answer came – For My glory.
For His glory.
I pondered these words, and I recalled that verse above from 1 Corinthians 10. I had lost sight of what it’s all about. It’s not about me. It’s about Him.
I’m an overachiever and goal-setter. I enjoy productivity and accomplishments and checking off my lists. Often times, I can question what I do when I can’t see big results or the results aren’t what I expected. I realized that a big part of my freaking out was my need for recognition and feeling accomplished. For putting myself out there. For showing the world what I can do. I love what I do! And my passion for those things is good! But, I wasn’t able to do what I wanted to the extent that I wanted to do it. I began comparing myself to others. I was measuring my value and my creativity up against theirs, and that was wrong. My focus needed some readjusting. God has placed desires in my heart for a purpose, and He’s given me the skills I need to make those things happen, but I need to remember that ultimately, it’s for His glory, not my own. And the truth is that what I do (however great or small) will always matter when it’s for His glory. God’s glory is how He makes Himself known to us and to others, and that’s the point! That’s what matters.
I decided to stop fretting and simply trust. I decided to just begin and do with what I have, remembering the greater purpose behind what I do.
This process isn’t through yet. What happens next is still uncertain, but I am learning to be content with where I am and am going after the things that matter. I’m asking for what I want, and I’m trusting God to open doors as I live each day for His glory. Ultimately, I want my life-song to ring true of just how awesome He is.
Be encouraged today, friends. If you are ever in a place of questioning whether or not what you do matters, know that it absolutely does! You have a purpose, and God has a plan designed specifically for you! God has designed each of us differently. He’s given us each our own talents and skills and opportunities. It’s up to us to recognize that (and if you’re unsure, ask Him to reveal those things to you) and put those things to use for His glory.
Choose to live out today for His glory.
Happy Tuesday, friends!